When we are emotionally open, free and grounded we are more able to be in connection with ourselves in a profound way. When we are open in this way, we can experience connection to others in profound ways as well. What usually comes to mind when I'm engaged in this kind of connection with another person is a band of golden light in the shape of the infinite "8" moving between myself and the other person's heart-center. In this exchange, clarity, truth, safety, support, love and discovery can occur between participants.
This is the goal of all human interaction, our inter-connectedness in action, when giving and receiving naturally occurs simultaneously for both people. In this space we engage in the discovery of who we are, where we are on our paths, and how we are inter-dependent. It also illustrates how we cannot thrive in "separation."
When we are emotionally closed, fearful, resistant and ungrounded, we are operating from another perspective; that of separated self-preservation. We are guarded, defensive. We don't trust the other or ourselves. In this scenario we are likely to take things others say personally. This leads us to push-pull or sink-escape scenarios. How many times have you been in a conversation that you felt all you wanted to do was escape or leave, but felt trapped? How many times have you left that conversation drained? Or, have you ever been in a conversation that left you feeling dominated, confused and angry? These are some of the symptoms of push-pull or sink-escape interactions. I provide clear techniques on how to better negotiate these kinds of interactions.
Q: How does one become emotionally grounded and connected to themselves? - it always starts with you making the commitment first.
A: You must be able to identify exactly what you are feeling in the present moment. Are you tired? Resistant? Sad? Inspired? Interested? Bold? Bored? Excited? Angry? Vulnerable? Child-like? Sensual? Ashamed?
Can you name what you are feeling? Can you accept all of your feelings - equally - as they occur, without judgment and with generosity? The more you can do this the more free you will feel. The more you give this to yourself, the more you will trust exactly who you are, where you are. The more you trust yourself emotionally, the more you will be able to trust yourself (and your truth) in the presence of others, and will be willing to accept others' truth without trying to change or fix them. When you encounter another and accept them as you have grown to accept yourself, you will be in a much greater position to feel safe in giving and receiving with them. Until self-ownership occurs, the exchange is not clear and there is little trust. And when trust is lacking, we tend to overcompensate, which leaves us feeling awkward, uncomfortable and disconnected.
Thus, giving and receiving is about building a stronger connection to what you are feeling, moment-to-moment. When we trust ourselves more deeply, we are less threatened and less likely to need to reject what others are giving. When this receiving is experienced by both people, each can experience the flow of giving and receiving more profoundly.